Field Dressing

 You did what you had to do to survive...
Inexperience is blameless...
Feeling exposed to the debris
That others cast off
When they emotionally explode...
You weren't prepped for this...
You never learned how to handle this...
When it felt like
Your flesh was being torn from your bones,
You lashed out,
Or you hid...
There was collateral damage, either way...
People got hurt,
As people do...
You allow reflexes to take over
When there is no time to think...
It's natural...
Old habits, 
Withdrawal from the offending situation
To prevent an eye for an eye
From bursting onto the scene...
A little mother of pearl sweetness
To protect your jelly soft skin,
As well as your razor sharp talons...
Diametrically opposed synchronistic quantum entanglement...
Over time
Plaques build like armor...
Scabs to scars to rigid, interlocking plates...
Surgically excise any guilt or regret
With whatever tools you have at hand...
A piece of glass...
A flint arrowhead...
Pine tar and torn fabric...
Distilled spirits...
Field dressing is all you can do...
Stainless steel sporks and stainless steel straws...
Steel wire and household items...
Whatever you scavenge
From bombed out shelters...
A landscape littered 
With landmines and old lovers,
Cast off prosthetic limbs, and detritus...
Bloodied hearts and bleeding spirit...
Memories of pain
Embodied by the lives we lead,
Future actions predicated on past actions
And reactions,
Those things that kept you alive
In the heat of battle...
When the twisters touched down...
When the light was so bright
It burned your skin down to the muscle...
When she said those words
At just the wrong time,
Pulling the pin,
And wishing you dead
While counting out the seconds...
Have no regrets...
Have no shame...
Have no guilt
About having done what you thought
You had to do to keep going...
Have no guilt 
About the things you'll have to do
In the future
To survive...
Suture the wounds, and keep moving...
Set the broken bones, and keep living...
Take cover when you hear the rifle cock...
Throw stones ahead of you
To test the ground...
Open your eyes,
Wide in the dark,
Total dilation,
To capture what light remains...